Saturday, August 18, 2018

NEW POEM: It Took a While, But I am Learning

There's a beauty in being at ease with someone - of NOT feeling the necessity to be connected every moment.  Seriously, I was not a big dater in my youth - being notable for a different type of popularity: being well-known and respected. (*makes "gacking" teenager sounds*)  At a time when my contemporaries were bumbling through the early trials and errors of couple-ness, I was planning the dances and special events they would attend.  I'm still kind of that way.

So I learned how to "be" with someone late. Really late. I won't call it "love" because I am too old for that presumption.  But it does still have some of the trappings - getting excited when you see them after several days, knowing all the correct buttons to push for fun, comfort, or calm.  Knowing someone well enough to know when to just "let be" without carrying that residue with you afterwards.

I am grateful for the lesson that relationships, good ones, are not about two halves making a whole - they are about two complete persons keeping each other in balance.  And for however long they are destined to last, they are to be treasured.

Keeping Company
by Judith Cullen
© 2018

Wisps of ivory lace, black trunks.
It all seemed so frantic before you,
the crazed heady rushing,
near desperate uncertainty.
The compelling, the potent,
overwhelming exhilaration.

Gentle caress, your finger on my arm.
The stark difference still jolts,
of two who drifted together,
slow moving magnetic forces,
two planets easing into
soothing conjunctive orbit.

Soft chat: my laugh to your smile.
Where was all the impetuous,
the irresponsible precipitance?
The unspoken compulsion:
offering vulnerability
to safeguard affinity.

Knowing wink, and happy sigh.
So different from all others
where need held a whip hand.
Truth cannot be bought
at the price of intemperance,
facts will not be rushed.

As companionship accrues, free
beyond any expectation, conscription.
Terms remain unsubscribed,
an accord of conviviality
without implicit, covert agenda -
lacking undisclosed strings.

Your tranquil eyes, sparkling, flashing.
Vulnerability never a commodity,
but a state of trust achieved
with patience, understanding,
the slow revelations of layers.
Perhaps we teach each other.

You might just be my compliment,
or not, neither of us knows.
Instead we hold hands and aim
for two wholes rather than halves.
When parting comes, should it,
each will be the greater for this touch.

No plans are held for you, for us.
Today is exhilarating enough:
confidence without consequence.
Together, at ease in this moment,
with tomorrow ever discounted.
Contentedly, keeping company.


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